Bipolar Disorder

Today’s Fear: My Take on Managing Inauguration Day Anxiety

/ Robin / 1 Comment

I’m having political anxiety right now. I’ve been worried about talking about it because I feel like I need to tell you about some personal choices and these days it seems dangerous to do that. I don’t think it can be helped. Haters gonna hate

Today is Inauguration Day for the next president. I’m not excited; I feel trepidation. I’m not happy; I feel depressed. I’m crushingly sad; I feel—very afraid.

I don’t know where you’re at today emotionally, but if you experience political anxiety, which can be about a bazillion things, here are a few to consider:

Are you stressed about potential policy changes that might affect you directly? Are you worried about the divisions in the country becoming deeper and more irreparable? Or maybe you’re concerned about the political climate affecting your community, workplace, or personal relationships?

Whatever the cause, political anxiety is real and affects a lot of us in very personal ways. Here’s what I’m doing to manage it—maybe some of these strategies can help you too:

  1. Stay Informed but Set Limits: I need to stay updated, but too much news can overwhelm anyone. I stick to trusted news sources and avoid misinformation, which can add to the anxiety.
  2. Engage in Constructive Conversations: Talking through my fears and opinions helps, but I make sure these discussions are constructive, not confrontational. Finding people who can engage in respectful dialogue—regardless of their political stance—helps me feel less isolated with my concerns.
  3. Immediate Actions for Emotional Relief: Since the elections have just concluded and the new president is being sworn in today, my feelings of urgency require immediate attention. In moments like these, I find it helpful to engage in activities that ground me in the present, like a short mindfulness exercise or a brisk walk.
  4. Self-care is Crucial: On days when everything seems too much, I prioritize self-care. Whether it’s reading a book, taking a walk, or practicing meditation, taking time to unwind helps reset my emotional state.
  5. Seek Professional Help if Needed: Sometimes, talking to friends or family isn’t enough. I’m not hesitant to seek help from a therapist or counselor, especially when anxiety starts to impact my daily life significantly.
  6. It’s Good to Have Your Own Opinions: Don’t let anyone bully you. Agree to disagree. Say it. Don’t be afraid. You can draw boundaries. “We can talk about this up to this point—and no further.” If the boundary is crossed, you have your own permission to exit the conversation. As the saying goes, “Just say NO.”

Remember, it’s okay to take a step back and breathe. Now more than ever, politics impacts us all in our daily lives, but taking care of your mental health is crucial. Let’s not let our fears and anxieties hold us back from living. Keep looking for moments of joy and unity—they can often be found where we least expect them.

Today’s video is a short that shows how beauty… well, you should check it out. Amazing.

Beauty and Peace

We can’t exist on an island alone. If you’re reading this then we definitely have some things in common. I’d really love to hear about some of your coping ideas. Why don’t you post some below?

Be well friends,

Robin

Political Anxiety Really Sucks: Do You Suffer from it Too?

/ Robin

Political Anxiety Really Sucks: Do You Suffer from It Too?

You know that pit-in-your-stomach feeling when you hear breaking news, and you just know it’s not going to be good? Yeah, me too. Political anxiety has basically set up camp in my brain, and it’s not paying rent. My family and I are right there with you, doom-scrolling through the headlines and trying to figure out how to stay informed without completely losing it. Spoiler alert: we haven’t cracked the code yet.

Let’s be real—this stress isn’t just annoying; it’s exhausting. It’s like the background music in a horror movie, always there, keeping you on edge. Even when you try to ignore it, it sneaks into your conversations, your social media feeds, and that tiny moment of peace you thought you had before bed. But here’s the thing: we’re all dealing with this, and it’s okay to admit it’s hard. (And if you’ve mastered the art of not caring while staying informed, please tell me your secrets!)

Over the next few posts, I’m going to dive into this whole political anxiety mess—what it is, why it feels so terrible, and what we can actually do about it. By the end of the series, I’m hoping we’ll all have a few solid tricks to keep our sanity intact without turning into hermits. Stick with me—it’s going to be an anxiety-filled, occasionally funny ride.

Fear and Mental Illness – Podcasts, Trigger Warnings, and Common Sense

/ Robin

I enjoy a good podcast. Time is limited so I can’t justify picking a slew of random episodes that are sure to disappoint or upset me. I don’t accept what podcasters say without question because generally speaking, they are armchair experts. I listen to them because I enjoy doing so. I do learn things. I hear ideas I’ve not thought of before. And frankly, I’m entertained.

“Robin, seriously? Podcasts with trigger warnings?”

Are you ready? Words are coming your way.

I’m afraid so. Some topics and situations break my heart. Others anger me. And there are those that I can’t listen to.

I’ve been learning about fear and horror movies and perhaps a sensible idea of why I refuse to watch horror them. I’ve always said that I have enough terror (thank you brain) in my life I don’t want to purposely add more. So, no thank you. But why won’t I go to a make-believe movie, but I can listen to a podcast about true crime? That’s a good question. I’m just wondering that myself.

Let’s stick with podcasts today. I enjoy listening to podcasts about history, and fake history. Why fake history? Because when it diverges from the actual history I was taught in school I think it’s weird.

PSA: Ignore my usage of “fake history” please. In this context, it is necessary to mention it because I do actually listen to those kinds of podcasts. My guidance here is: You, do you.

I listen to true crime probably more than I should. I’ve started choosing topics and searching for episodes about them. It’s remarkable how many cut and paste from each other. Some even mention how many YouTube videos they watched to learn about the topic. And this, strangely, leads me to trigger warnings.

A trigger warning is meant to give you a chance to turn away from the content before you feel harmed by it. That could be defined in many ways, but let’s stick with my simple definition of it.

[The following example is made up. It never happened.] This could be an example of something that’s triggering: I love potted plants. I’ve had this particular aloe vera plant in a beautiful pot for four years now. My dad gave it to me. He’s gone now. I lost my mind (read as I lost my temper in a big way) and was screaming at someone. They picked up Sara (that’s the plant) and smashed her on the wall.

What’s the trigger? People messing with my potted plants, especially ones named Sara.

If I choose to listen to a true crime podcast about extreme and violent child rape and murder and I literally cannot handle that, then when I learn about what the content is or there is a trigger warning and I still listen to it, well, I’m stupid and I’m asking for it.

There are always moments in every day when we must engage with our personal common sense director in our brain and listen to what it says. You know how some say that the proverbial door in the brain doesn’t close before the talking starts? It’s just like that. If you see an obviously devastating car crash and you see legs sticking out and you keep looking, and you don’t look away as common sense would suggest, and you see a severed head, gore and all, you have probably ignored your common sense and made a stupid choice. Don’t tell me you’re just looking to see what’s going on and there’s nothing wrong with that, or curious. This isn’t a war zone (I hope you’re not in a war) and there is no need for you to expose your Bipolar brain to that.

I struggled for most of my life with violent mood swings. Violent feelings would come over me and boil into my interactions with others whether I was with them or not. Hatred. I hated and I screamed and I broke things. I simmered. I’m actually agitated about something now, so I’ll leave that there. I just realized that trying to recall those feelings was going in the wrong direction.

I’m back. I took some time to play with my dog and chill, and now I can finish this. You wouldn’t think that writing that small amount would “trigger” me.

Common sense – Listen to your experience, your intuition, and your knowledge and you choose what to listen to. No one can make that choice for you. Take away the trigger warning and the title of the episode should give you much of what you need to know right up front. If you still choose the one you damn well know you shouldn’t and you have no logical reason for choosing it I just want to say that nothing is worth going back to dark places and you might be a dummy. Talk to yourself about it.

Your choice.

If you don’t avoid things that trigger you and you purposefully choose to listen to a podcast that will certainly trigger you, you are making an unwise decision. That’s a rough one. Don’t do it.

Mental Illness shouldn’t be easily dismissed just because you’re listening to podcasts. I avoid ones I can’t tolerate. I’m not going there. Period. You shouldn’t either.

Until next time,

Robin

“Do better. Try harder “
From “Redhanded,” a true crime podcast.
We have it on our refrigerator that hasn’t worked since June. It’s new. It’s insane.

We Must Adapt, But It Might Not Be How You Expect

/ Robin

Hello Friend,

We all know that life changes all the time. We grow, change, and adapt, or problems begin to arise. This is true whether we have a mental wellness challenge like Bipolar Disorder or not.

I’ve never had long hair before, but the first year of covid, I didn’t have any hair cut. The second year, it had grown so long that I decided to let it go its thing and keep growing.

The problem with this, surprisingly, is that I have no idea what to do with it now that it’s past my shoulders. I know, Robin, ask our friend Google.

Here are some of the strange ways I’ve had to learn to adapt:

If you’ve adjusted, good on you. If not, it’s not too late.

Adapting to things doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re big important things; sometimes, they are small, seemingly simple things that may seem trifling or silly. They may not be so minor to you.

Remember my hair experiment? After my hand surgery having long hair made it easy to take care of, except for washing it with one hand while the other was above my brain.

Today I’m adapting again; our shower drain is blocked. Despite snaking it, my son was defeated by hair. And look, my daughter’s hair is far longer than mine! So no shower before I take my thumb to OT. Unlike years past, I don’t have to wear a hat and can enjoy the way all the opinionated bits of hair assert their dominance over me by leaking the not-so-private information that my hair’s dirty. I’m about to use both hands and just put it up!

Long hair has its advantages.

I still don’t know how to style it. My hand can’t hold a brush well yet, so more adapting. 

Adaption comes in all different ways. Hair may seem a small and vain thing, but it can be a large part of our identity. I put a hat on my dirty short hair because it embarrassing to go to the campus with dirty hair.

I adapt.

We adapt.

Be well,

Robin

Bipolar Disorder |  When Stress Becomes Danger | 4 Hours Left

/ Robin

I’ve been meaning to sit down and talk to you about this but, you know how it is. Stress sidelines the DOING bit after the brain thinks of something to do. In my case (this time), I have an excruciating surgery tomorrow morning, and I’m not looking forward to it. I’m not looking forward to the pain. Being able to use my thumb without debilitating pain aim definitely look directly at it. You see, I had the same surgery done on my other thumb two years ago, and I know how horribly, terribly, and frightening that pain was.

Let me quickly bring you up to date. We’ve since discovered that I have the nasty illness commonly called Fibromyalgia. I refer to it as Fibro because that’s just too long. We think that the constant pressure of the cast sent the pain level of a routine harrowing hand surgery above the charts. And no, pain meds didn’t work.

Ah yes, what’s the surgery? I’m having something put between the bones in my thumb joint. I have Osteoarthritis; this disease eats away at the stuff that keeps your bones from grinding against each other and causing intense pain.

Since it is now 2:45 a.m. I’m going to move on quickly. Leading up to today, life has been chaotic, emotional, and expensive beyond our means to pay for.

Bailey, my Kelpie (She’s a cattle dog. Google Kelpie, they’re pretty great dogs.), has struggled with severe skin issues all spring and summer. Our regular vet is booked out for months. Covid hit, and all the vets disappeared. I’m completely serious. In this area, Puget Sound in Washington State, veterinarians have been scrambling to find staff. While we waited to get in, the problems worsened. This leads us to take her to a doggie dermatologist. This is all so expensive. This is also so stressful and is especially so because of my surgery being tomorrow today at 7:30 a.m. PST.

We have a radioactive cat. Maks has growths on his thyroid and had to have feline hyperthyroid radiation treatment. I think I got that right. Anyway, he’s on the mend and zooming around the house. He’s gaining weight, and I think he’ll do really well. While he’s healing, we have to put all the dirty litter in bags, and those bags have to go in buckets, and those buckets have to sit around for 80 before we can take them to the dump. Apparently, they don’t want radioactive waste in landfills.

All these things combined with life in general, Bipolar Disorder, ADHD, PTSD, RA, OA, and Fibromyalgia, and I’m a sitting duck for a generous helping of losing control. I’ve stopped saying that I’m super stressed out because these life events are painful emotionally and overwhelming financially. Marriages and partners break up because of money. Imagine me and my underemployed family (I’m on disability so I’m broke all the time.) We had to borrow money from my mother and charge the rest. She suggested that we put the animals down if we couldn’t afford to get them help. Seriously?

Anxiety, stress, anger… entering the danger zone. And now it’s 3:03 a.m. I think we should add fear to that little list.

I need to post this now. I’ve run out of time to catch you up. Stay tuned to see how this mentally ill woman deals with family members not too willing to stay with me for a while. I won’t be able to do so many things. This time it’s my very dominant hand. My left one thinks I’m dumb if I think it’s going to do right-hand stuff. Self-righteous little bugger. This is a team effort. That hand better get with the program.

I’m going to attempt to get on Twitter and tweet updates on how things are going since blogging are iffy for the time being. I’ve never used Twitter more than a tweet here and there, so this should be interesting. I hope you’ll follow along! Join in my mad life and all the fun and bonkers ways I manage, primarily, to live my Bipolar and highly complex life.  I need to learn to do voice-to-text. (I’m too tired to edit this, so I hope it makes sense.)

Follow me on Twitter @etiquetteofmad

See you on the other side.