It is a fact that many highly creative people feel that getting their Bipolar Disorder under control means they will lose the creative fire they have had burning inside for so long. The strength, the depth, the fire… it seems lost.
We feel we become a shell of our former exciting, dangerous selves. But that’s the trade-off. Be stable and feel stunted or feel crazy and out of control.
Personally, I would like to feel more emotions. I know Bipolar Disorder is a mood disorder and that we feel things much more severely than the average person does. It has destroyed me more than once. I know that. Yet, I miss feeling the warmth that intense emotions gave me. I miss being able to write stories from an emotional base, instead of from a purely academic place.
I don’t want to mess with my meds. But I do want to feel more. There must be a way to ignite the fire again without burning myself down.
Maybe you can talk to your psychiatrist about switching medications? I know they all have different side effects.
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Not a bad idea. I’ve been so happy to be stable I haven’t thought it could be better in this way. I will definitely ask her. Thanks for the idea.
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